S12 Power Rankings -- All Star Break Edition

1. Cheyenne Duck Snorts (65-26, Run Differential: +273)
The author regrets perceived assholery associated with putting his team first, but Cheyenne has scored the most runs, allowed the least, and has the best record at the ASB by 7 wins. Cheyenne’s run differential is greater than any two other teams on this list combined. If that’s not enough, the Duck Snorts are currently on a 19-1 run. Can you guess the opposing pitcher that snapped what could have been a ridiculous 20-game win streak?

2. Pittsburgh Ponies (55-36, RD: +135)
Correct – that pitcher was Griffey’s poster boy, the Mustachioed Minnesotan Matt Ross, who dominated Cheyenne in a 3-2 Pony victory. Ross, while “in decline,” has already garnered his requisite Pitcher of the Week, etc. But what needs to be appreciated is that the historically pitching-heavy Ponies feature Griffey’s second-best offense, based on runs scored (531) and team SLG (.841).

3. Chicago Cubs (58-33, RD: +119)
As in other recent seasons, the NL’s top-ranked team has the NL’s second-ranked team, Fargo, nipping at their heels, as documented by cjl9652’s recent “Hiya, erff!” Waveland Avenue ball hawks have again been treated to a barrage of souvenirs generated by the home team, as the Cubs lead the NL in HR by a wide margin (180 vs. Fargo’s 147). Gabby Young came into the All-Star break with 47 dingers, leading all players.

4. Charleston Chew-baccas (58-33, RD: +123)
Griffey World’s favorite Wookiees/Candy, known historically an offense-heavy team, have featured a balanced approach in S12 ranking 2nd in AL team ERA and 3rd in AL team runs scored. Of particular note, Rookie DH David Lima has treated opposing pitchers how Charleston’s name sake treats Stormtroopers/fillings. Lima has posted a 1.152 OPS and 26 HR in only 64 games this season. AL South opposition will have difficulty wresting control of the AL South from Charleston without sticking Lima on a Kessel-bound spice freighter/in the freezer.

5. Fargo Fuzznuts (57-34, RD: +78)
The defending Griffey Champs have overcome a 5-9 start to climb within striking distance of Chicago, and will get their chance to take the lead as their second half opens with a four-game set against their chief rivals. As in years past, the Fuzznuts feature a strong offense (ranked 2nd in NL OPS, .834). Three Fargo players rank in the Top 10 in NL batting average – Alan Green, Fred Serra, and Benito Feliz.

6. Atlanta Ripettoes (53-38, RD: +77)
The Ripettoes are running away with an otherwise weak division, boasting a 13 game lead over their nearest rival, the New York Knights. However, Atlanta fans are still tuning in as one of Griffey World’s all-time greats, Michael Snow, approaches 600 HR. With 19 HR accounted for already on the season and 13 still needed to reach the milestone, Snow is on pace to pass 600 HR sometime around Game 153. Should be fun to watch.

7. Washington Foo Fighters (51-40, RD: +83)
Despite inconsistent play, Washington currently leads Boston in the AL East – the only AL division where the top dog has less than a double-digit lead. The Foo Fighters have been burdened by an uncharacteristically low team OPS of .767 and an unremarkable team WHIP of 1.40. In the second half, and home that Clint Ramirez (24 HR, 76 RBI) and SP Scott Terry (8-3, 1.27 WHIP) can provide the stimulus package needed to stabilize their volatile season.

8. Richmond Rednecks (50-41, RD: +74)
Newcomer nesman has served well at the helm of the Richmond’s Ford F350 dually. With a two-game lead over Little Rock, the Yosemite Sam “Back-Off!” mudflaps are clearly on display. Maintaining the lead would go a long way in restablishing the moribund former-Florida franchise as something other than “the team that traded Matt Ross.”

9. Seattle Mariners (55-36, RD: +69)
The Mariners find themselves in firm control of one of the AL’s two Wild Card slots and seem likely to snap the franchise’s eight-season playoff drought. A strong bullpen, featuring three pitchers with sub-1.25 WHIPs. has kept Seattle in close games. GM the_oat may do well to find a middle-of-the-order bat to strengthen a middling offense.

10. Jackson Shoes (48-43, RD: +70)
Like the Richmond and Seattle, train finds himself leading an impressive retreading of a formerly malodorous franchise. The Shoes have not been in the playoffs since S2, but anchored by a strong pitching staff (ranked T-3 in AL WHIP with 1.34), find themselves in strong position to tread on that trend. Like Seattle, a trade for a big bat might help their chances (ranked 10th in AL OPS).

S11 Power Rankings ~ 60 games

1. Chicago Cubs (42-18, Run Differential: +122)
Chicks dig the long ball, and the Lincoln Park Trixies love their Cubbies who lead Griffey World with an astonishing 156 HRs (2.6 per game) despite playing in the NL. The offense has been led by Gabby Young(32 HR, 65 RBI) and 2B Sammy Marquez (26 HR, 76 RBI). Should make for an interesting series this weekend when the Cubbies face….

2. Cheyenne Duck Snorts (42-18, RD: +116)
…the Cheyenne Duck Snorts, who lead the AL in team HR (129) and OPS (.897) playing in pitcher friendly Conte Yard. Wyoming residents have been treated to 1.000+ OPS performances to-date from 1B Pete Casian (1.022), newly acquired free-agent OF/1B Al Javier (1.010), and RF Lou Young (1.003). Lackluster bullpen performances from Vic Venafro (34 IP, 1.82 WHIP) and Tarrik Moore (40.1 IP. 1.66 WHIP) have let AL opposition back into games late.

3. Fargo Fuzznuts (38-22, RD: +90)
The defending NL Champs feature the NL’s second best offense, which is exactly good enough for the second-best record in the NL…and in their own division. Griffey legend David Murata (not to be confused with the other David Murata) has swatted 41 extra-base hits on the season for a 1.205 OPS. However, Murata’s potency has been offset by SS Sherman Atchley’s slow start (.224 AVG).

4. Pittsburgh Ponies (36-23, RD: +79)
The Ponies may miss Dean Bukvich more than expected. While the perennial AL powerhouse would still be the least desirable draw in the AL bracket come playoff time, they are no longer shoo-ins for a first-round bye as Charleston and Washington feature comparable records. The loss of Bukvich on the mound has been compensated thus far by the unexpected performance of catcher Alejandro Johnson (.307 AVG, 47 RBI).

5. Washington Foo Fighters (34-26, RD: +51)
Clint Ramirez may be the AL’s offensive equivalent of Matt Ross. The slugger, who leads the AL in HR (26) and RBIs (77), also ranks 4th in batting average, making him a legitimate triple crown threat…and he’s also stolen 10 bases.

6. Cincinnati centipedes (35-25, RD: +62)
Cincinnati has the distinct displeasure of sharing a division with the two other NL teams discussed in the Power Rankings so far. The team’s middle of the road offense has been offset by a superior pitching performance to-date (1.30 WHIP, ranked 2nd NL) – seven centipedes have posted WHIPs of 1.20 or less on the season. As a result, no team has allowed fewer runs than Cincinnati.


7. Charleston Chewbaccas (36-23, RD: +36)
The defending Griffey champs have been getting it done in S11 with an enviable blend of pitching and hitting. SP Kyle Fisher has been 7-2 on the season with a 1.09 WHIP, while four Chewbaccas boast 40 or more RBI on the season ( Frank Lee, Jeremy Stern, Justin Franco, and Vic Polanco).

8. Atlanta Ripettoes (31-18, RD: +49)
Like Charleston, the Ripettoes -- current leaders in the NL South -- have also featured a balanced attack. Atlanta’s pitching staff boasts the lowest team WHIP on the season, and Dennis Duran (30 HR, 75 RBI) may be the only NL player who can give Gabby Young a run for the NL MVP.

9. Honolulu Beach Bums (34-25, RD: +20)
In contrast to the last two entries, the Beach Bums live and die with their moundsmen. Honolulu features three SP (Rico Andujar, Sandy Conway, and Joe Faulkner) with sub-1.20 WHIPs. A trade may be in order to obtain a slugger to drive in table-setters Sam Stewart (.393 OBP) and Nolan Cashman (.417 OBP).

10. Monterrey Rancheros (30-30, RD: +38)
A pedestrian record belies the fact that the Rancheros round out the top quarter of Griffey World teams in team run differential. A strong rotation bolstered by rookie Gus Marte (WHIP: 1.12; 3.8 to 1 K:BB ratio) should keep the Rancheros in the hunt.

Griffey All-Decade Team

To mark 10 great seasons of Griffey world, we're going to compile an all-decade team using our sadly neglected blog. We will pick one player and possibly an alternate for each position, but maybe we'll put together a full rotation and bullpen of some sort if the response is strong enough.

So what can you do to help, you might ask? Send me a site mail detailing the candidacy of as many players as you care to nominate. Please include some qualifications -- including statistics, awards or postseason prowess -- to help save me and bajoraa some research and make the strongest case for each player. Anyone may submit a player, no matter how long you've been part of the league, and you can nominate any player you think is worthy. Maybe we'll even put together a list of players with the most dubious achievements (most frequently traded or waived, worst-ever contract, etc.) if you can think of any.

Once we get some nominees, I'll put up a poll for each position, including a list of each nominee's qualifications. You can use the comments for each post to lobby for your favorites, since I'm pretty sure votes can be changed on a Blogger poll. If you have any ideas for improving this endeavor, list them in the comments below.